Reeducate the Cynical

I need to reeducate myself:

As of late, I’ve fallen into a dangerous and dastardly cynicism, and I’m not enjoying it. It’s coming at a high price—the ability to compromise, comprehend, and co-create (it took me a total of 30 seconds to come up with three C’s).

A number of factors have come up to suddenly bring this wave onto me:
My Government class comes to mind.

AP U.S. Government was a real eye-opener for me from the beginning. I won’t pretend I was a special breed, thus amplifying the above statement: I am your average nerd in an AP Gov’t class—interested in politics before joining, plans to be politically active, didn't really understand wtf the news was trying to say.

I’m proud to say I understood the President during his live Internet Chat on youtube (and greatly enjoyed his Roosevelt reference, even if I don’t hold too high of an opinion on FDR).

Normally, this would be viewed at as a brilliant thing! “Look, these children understand our politics!”

Education is the greatest equalizer of man, and that makes me lethal.

I want to say that one day and genuinely mean it.

We gotta start aimin' for THIS, dudes.

Yet the downside is, like reality, not simple: I grew a set of core beliefs. Most people wouldn’t see this as a bad thing, I don’t think, but I feel the need to elaborate. When we grow this core belief, we tend to reject anything and everything opposing those beliefs, even if they make sense or could benefit the whole of the nation/community. We see this all the time: our Congressional leaders pulling the breaks on the nation’s business, the far-out margins spouting their beliefs on their metaphorical soapboxes. You may see it as backwards, yet they (hopefully, depending on your viewpoint) see the rest of the world as wrong. And that isn’t healthy. For anyone. We need more pragmatists in the world, I think. People willing to look at the situation at hand and act for the good of the nation instead of those looking out the lends of their beliefs first and then applying themselves to the situation at hand—we need policy for ideals, and not ideals for policy (gotta love sound bites).

At the same time an admired man once said “If you stand for nothing, you’ll fall for anything!” So how much of this is actually harmful? How much is too much? Will we ever know? What struggles are worth fighting for?! When are we pushing it too far!? When do our leaders, and ourselves, overextend their cores or their beliefs (parties) and endanger the nation and the world?

If you find the answer to these questions easy to come by, I envy you. I wish I had that shiny box-world, where all the solutions were wrapped up with a nice bow. Simple patters, straight lines, and easy access to follow. Unfortunately, I live in an odd place.

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confusion!!

Currently, I’d have to try and find the balance. . . .and that struggle will remain with me forever as a struggle to keep improving myself. Or keep myself at a functional level. Yeah, I think the latter’s the most accurate. My thoughts are in a constant state between too little and too much. Those moments I feel perfection is more just a chemical reaction existing in an isolated environment, which puts me on the same boat as just about everybody else on the planet.

Sure, some argue that a healthy dose of cynicism’s good for the soul, which may be true, but I don’t want to be too closed off from the rest of the options of the world as to live in a bias. I guess I want to forever live in the state of a tabula raza.

A young, impressionable, clean youth, pure and unspoiled by the biases of the world; is that a good thing to aspire to? I don’t know.

You cannot stay completely clear of opinion if you want to dive into a subject. It’s not possible. Even the most silenced of wallflowers has an opinion to express inside. Yet I don’t want to be clouded from acceptance of others! I don’t want to limit any progress that could be made through that limitation! I also don’t want to give up.

Stephen Colbert was once quoted as saying “Cynics always say no. But saying ‘yes’ begins things.”

We once spent an entire week in AP lang trying to decipher within ourselves (or debate) which was best.

“Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness, a rejection of the world because we are afraid it will hurt or disappoint us.”

To change the validity of this statement, one would have to change the definition of cynicism, and maybe make a reference to an important figure to back it up. Einstein is good.

The financial state of the nation spiraling Collage students into debt and killing me kindly with the promise of a better future I’ll probably not get, because the nation’s in a state of disarray and I won’t be able to work at DreamWorks or Pixar or Disney and I’ll be stuck with a useless degree . . . . .

Oh look, problems!

“They only tell you want you want to hear” My Gov’t teacher says “You’re all wonderful and it’s never your fault. Those mean Republicans/Democrats don’t care about America or Grandma! We’ll take care of it!” While he mimes kicking the metaphor of an imaginary can. “By the way, we’re 16 trillion in the hole! On a rocket ship to 20!”

“You’re giving us nightmares, you know.” I had to blurt out like an idiot.

He looked shocked. “I never meant to. I simply wanted to expose you to realities of our system.”

And here I am yelling at newspaper article titles.

Stephen Colbert, Ironically enough one of the most influential figures in my life and a person responsible for my core belief . . . .for lack of a better word, problem, once had these words to say on cynicism: “Remember, you cannot be both young and wise. Young people who pretend to be wise to the ways of the world are mostly just cynics.”

I don’t want to not believe in anything! I want to be entranced by the beauty of the world. I want magic to occur! I want solutions. I want an ending to this chapter even if it has to be dragged out of the world while it kicks and screams because the grown ass people know when it’s time to stop being selfish! Yet something keeps me from shouting and leaves me largely empty and drowned, like the weight of this world I have in my head snuffs out the fires.

 “Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it.”

Well it looks like I’m far from my goal.

 “Because cynics don’t learn anything.”

I’m trying. That’s the point of this blog. Dearest no one, I use you for therapy.

“Cynics always say no. But saying “yes” begins things. Saying “yes” is how things grow. Saying “yes” leads to knowledge. “Yes” is for young people. So for as long as you have the strength to, say “yes'.”

“’yes’ is for young people.”

I want to stay young.

Forever young again.

But I’m only 17.

“So for as long as you have the strength to, say ‘yes’.”

Right now, I’m going through a weird mix between “Nothing’s that great” (quoted from Julia Nunes) to “I’m not a hero!!” (A little thing my friends do: ‘Dude, I’d totally ROCK as an Avenger!!’ ‘No wai, man!’. . . .), to “The name on everybody’s lips is gonna be (mine).” to me laughing at how silly I sound. And repeat.

Can’t I get over this and be some silly kid again all of the time?

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Adulthood’s five months away? I gotta get used to this shit? . . . . Okay (I guess. Military can consider you to be a dependent to 26. . . . . But I don’t want to be dependent and I hate not trying. Damnit).

Erphh. . . . How about I stop thinking so much and get back to something easy, like my book report or finding the cure for cancer?

The nation’s problems will come the day I am good and ready to enter into office, and that’s another 18 or so years from now!!

I'd get the last quoted sentence as a tattoo if it wouldn't sound terrible out of context.

With Love,
Nikola Strange.

(("WHY DON'T YOU PAY FOR THE STOCK PHOTOS?!"
I'm too broke to pay for free photos, okay!! DD:))