Oh my God, I have a crush on Charlie McDonnell!

Listen to them NOW! DFTBA records!

For about a year now, I’ve been watching  “Charlieissocoollike”’s videos on YouTube after a recommendation from a friend when she found I had had gotten into Chameleon Circuit (whom totally deserve their own post—multiple post).

After some pestering from this chum of mine, I decided it was high-time to watch this so-called “Charlie” person. I tacked in the name and clicked on a video: this odd-looking British boy with funny rusted hair was staring back at me, talking about some everyday stuff he managed to make pretty interesting, along with some other at times oddball ideas, which again were delivered in an interesting manner.

Although I cannot remember the first video I watched, I can remember greatly enjoying the videos I watched that week, and subscribing a day or two into the discovery of Mr. McDonnell.  And really, what wasn’t there to love? We’re talking about a dude in his room/house making ridiculous videos that are genuine and fun to watch. Every video concerns such normal things, yet since it's written out and delivered to you so smoothly he makes them seem more exciting than when other people do them, much like how the music tab makes your friend’s funny Facebook status better turn into euphoria, and how gifs on tumblr can make buttered toast the best thing on the planet, even if it’s a sarcastic post.

In fact, I remember being genuinely impressed at the amount of camera tinkering that went into his procrastination video (to the right).

Plus I am a huge fan of British humor, and he seems like a great person, too. Very fun, relaxed (mostly), honest and downright fun/funny.

Yeah, this dude had another loyal follower.

It wasn’t until today, while procrastinating on all of the things I said I was going to do today, that I realized something astonishing while watching the Resolute Unicycling Muppet video. It was almost like the skies had open up by decree of the universe so that a revelation could come to pass--I have a crush on Charlie McDonnell!

As overly dramatic as that last sentence made it seem, my secondary reaction (()) was strangely Gryffindorian*:

Every damn time.

I mean, yeah Charlie is great and deserves all the love in the world as decreed by the laws of decent humanity and his legion of loyal fangirls, but why did this legion need me? Why did I like him?

Maybe this is just my thing, but It didn’t initially make sense to me, or maybe, as they say in my parent’s homeland, “Toda via no me caia el 20”^! So I began to really analyze what I define as beautiful:

As a younger version of me, I was often told that beauty lied in the heart of the beholder, and the phrase stuck with me more than other words of wisdom for whatever reason, so I began to make my own definition of beauty. . . .

And this is essentially what I’ve come up with:

Beauty is an emotion. It is not a question of being aesthetically pleasing. There is an entire science behind what is aesthetically pleasing to look at for another human being—what you would naturally be more inclined to look at—all to create a perfect realism for products. And every now and again some blessed individual will be born with that perfect face somewhat naturally.

But this is not the same as being beautiful. To be beautiful, in my opinion, is to spark an emotion within a person—a feeling I can only describe as beauty—to be happy, calm and accepting with an underlying but distinct feeling of fascination towards the person of your affection. It’s the distinct wanting to peel away at every layer of the onion and inspect each and every single line of it—every expression, every flush of color, every movement and shift in tone; to see what makes the person feel happy or sad or frightened or whatever, and to be, during the entire process, fascinated, happy and grateful they exist at all. That’s what I call being enamored.

Though logically I wouldn’t call it that, because I’ve never really met Charlie in reality and probably never will—in fact, I’d be shocked and ecstatic and too embarrassed to respond if he ever even found this post. More so if he bothered to skim through it.

Not to mention I was thinking of my best friends while writing out the definition, because “beautiful” isn’t just a unisex term in my mind, is also isn’t exclusively romantic.

Because the way I see it, why not surround yourself with “beautiful” people. People whom become so much more attractive with their flaws and fallbacks and misgivings, because there’s so much to love about people—certain types of people, I think; I’ve tricked myself into thinking all people are beautiful because I ignore those I don’t think are, so I’m surrounded by my definition of beauty (Does this post even make sense?)

Strangely enough, despite the fact I can see people as aesthetically pleasing and do find myself gawking at exceptionally pleasing people, I don’t ever find them physically attractive until I’ve pegged them with the title of beautiful, and often find myself finding the closest of friends physically attractive because they’re so beautiful.

And I found Charlie to be so beautiful during that video I could not stand it.

Which made me sort of worry what it’d be like when he’d change! Because I automatically connected it back to the “I’m excited” video, and how people will always change and evolve as they grow, and if I now found Charlie beautiful then it would be bound to end at some point in the future when he’d change, right?!

Wrong, actually. I went back to watch some older videos of his and found myself inwardly swooning like a woman from the 1950s. *Awkward*

This is a real person, and I will never know him, and I am swooning like a girl from the 1950s while trying (and failing) to keep a somewhat straight face.

I’ve been told about a million times my face is like a map.

*Sighs!* Regardless of my reaction to the chemicals in my brain, Charlie is now the cutest British man in all the United Kingdom to me, because he has become so beautiful.

So beautiful in fact, it’s now on my bucket list to hug him and maybe have a conversation that doesn’t consist of awkward silence and “How are you?” repeated over and over again.

Charlie, if you do by some odd miracle find this, you should know that you’re lovely to me and to a ton of other people across the globe. And I hope that thought puts a smile on your face. :3

With love
Nikola Strange

In celebration of my feelings, here’s Charlie:

My feelings exactly at the moment, more or less.

UPDATE:
Charlie has a girlfriend by the name of Bryarly Bishop.
Well, that crush lasted less than 24 hrs. :3
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These are my notes:
((by secondary reaction, I mean my feelings towards the feeling of suddenly having a crush. . ..I don’t know if this is the correct term, or a term at all, but it sounded smart and correct, so. . . .))

^”Toda via no me cae el 20”, or “The 20 hasn’t hit me yet” is an allusion to payphones in Mexico, which once upon a time when they were real, would have some difficulty accepting currency (20 cents, or “pesos”) because it would get stuck on the way down. The phone would give you no notions of it receiving your money until you tapped the side of it, much like you’d tap an old TV when the picture would blur. The phrase is used now-a-days to express something that hasn’t QUITE hit you yet. You’re waiting for it to register.

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I’m going to try something new called propaganda, or friendly reminders, to see what’ll happen so:
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